America's Next Top Model - Episode 10 Part 1 - Two Broads Have Gotta Go.

Well well well. Where do I even begin. I’m going to split this two hour season finale into two separate blogs, otherwise it will be much too long and no one will bother reading it. So…the first hour. Let’s begin.

FINAL FOUR, BITCHES! It’s down to Raina, Angelea, Krista and Alexandra. The girls are told to pack an overnight bag, and they’re whisked into the air by Mr & Ms Jay. Their challenge is to walk down the aisle (mid-flight…can you imagine?) and show some personality. Krista is fun and bubbly, Alexandra mimics a flight attendant, Raina looks like a linebacker and Angelea bobble heads/giggles all over the place and only has one heel on - she apparently travels very lightly. Teacher’s pet Krista wins the challenge, and gets $2000 worth of sparkly jewels. Since she was the first photo called last week, she gets an extra $1000 worth, and has about 25 little blue boxes piled high with trinkets. Bitch opens every single box in front of the other girls and doesn't offer to give them anything. Someone doesn’t have any manners!

PHOTOSHOOT
The theme of the photo shoot is “ugly pretty”, not to be confused with “pretty ugly”. The girls get Sweeny Todd-ified with renaissance outfits, crazy hair and black lips and get to work. They find out that not one, but TWO of them will be going home. The pressure is on.

Krista’s natural eyebrows have been replaced with giant, circular clown ones which are drawn on her forehead. Her outfit is all kinds of ugly, but she of course rocks the shoot. The end result is so perfect that Andre almost starts crying. There is no doubt in my mind that Krista is winning this competition.

Raina looks like Mozart. Her photo ends up being quite strong, but is it strong enough? She’s all squinty.

Angelea looks like she has no eyelashes, and she doesn’t have any oomph. Also, wtf is with the photo being all blurry? You mean to tell me that out of that entire shoot, the absolute best picture looks like it was taken by Mohammed Ali? Totally calling BS on that.

Alexandra looks half decent – for a fatty. Her face is gripping, she’s staring intently, and playing with her ring, which for some reason Tyra quite likes.

JUDGING
The first name that Tyra calls……………..is……….
Krista. As expected, Krista is moving on to the final.

And now we have the bottom three. The next name Tyra calls will be in the final two, and the other girls will be sent home. Raina has a beautiful, romantic face but still isn’t coming out of her comfort zone. Angelea has the worlds biggest zit on her chin and didn’t cover it up, which is clearly grounds for dismissal. Alexandra has a beautiful plus sized body, but, its still plus sized.

The name Tyra calls is…

Raina.

Wow – that actually really surprised me. I would have guessed Angelea in the top 2, but it was not to be. Tyra keeps The Brows in the game and sends the other two packing. Bye bye ladies!




That concludes Part 1 – Part 2 coming up!