As we all know, the girls are now in lovely New Zealand. Their house is massive and overlooks what seems to be the entire country. Jessica continues to prove that her IQ is way below the national average (last week she stated that she thought New Zealand was right above Canada) when she decides to warm some taco shells by placing them on the toaster. Now, I’m no chef, but I’m fairly certain that there is a better way to do this – microwave or oven comes to mind. But no, she places them on top of the toaster, and plunges down the handle. A few seconds later, the taco shells burst into flame, and Jessica frantically tries to put it out by screaming. When the screaming doesn’t work, she throws a towel on the fire, which of course lights up as well. Eventually the fire goes out, and the girls tell Jessica that they feel bad for her kid because she totally can’t put out a fire. Or warm taco shells.
CHALLENGE
The girls are sent to Hobbittown, where Lord of the Rings was filmed. Angelea has never heard of LOTR so she is completely unimpressed. The rest of the girls act like they’re excited, but I’m guessing Sci-Fi flicks aren’t exactly their forte either. Their challenge is to pose in a Hobbit doorway, which as you can imagine, is quite small. It’s obvious that Krista is going to win the challenge, and when she does (point!), she over-acts being surprised – probably just to rub it in. Angelea seethes. Back at the ginormous house, Krista and Alexandra make fun of Raina for being fake (read: not a raging bitch) because she commented on how beautiful New Zealand was. In the other girls defense, Raina did utter the words “oh my lanta!” which is absolutely not okay in any situation.
PHOTOSHOOT
Guess who’s taking pictures this week? Tyra! They’re in a vineyard, and the premise of the shoot is that they need to fight for light, just like the grapes fight for the sun. Sounds logical. But wait…there’s more! Tyra’s minions will be holding up patterns so the sun/shadows falls onto the models faces, making them look like kaleidoscopes. Oh, and they’ll have mud in their hair. I’m sorry, but LOL. Leave it to Tyra to just add random aspects to everything she does.
Alexandra looks pretty good, but not sure why they just put her hair in a messy muddy bun. Also, she always make the same face - head tilted up, mouth slightly open. NEXT.
Jessica is up, and she knows she needs to nail it or she’s gonna be gone. Did I mention she’s been talking about her damn kid again? UGH. She struggles at first, but eventually finds her “ugly pretty face”.
Raina is next, wearing nothing but panties and a smile. She looks awkward and can’t really get into the poses.
Angelea is mega boring and posey, and finally Tyra tells her to just pretend like she’s dead. This seems to work and Tyra says she got a good shot.
Krista comes out and, as we all expected, nails it.
JUDGING
Alexandra actually comes out with a great shot, and the vineyard in the background looks beautiful. Andre says she looks like shes from a foreign place like Uzbekistan. This pleases him for some reason.
Raina’s photo actually frightens me – she looks dark and disturbed, and it looks like it was taken in a basement instead of a bright and sunny vineyard.
Angelea’s pic bores me to death, but Tyra and Nigel both love the soft simplicity of it. And by soft simplicity, they must mean “playing dead because Tyra couldn’t get you to do anything she wanted”.
Jessica’s pic is big time ‘meh’. Andre says the shadows are wearing her instead of the other way around. I agree.
Krista is last, and of course the judges are in luff with her pic. Andre says she could be in Zu magazine, which is obviously French and fabulous. My beef with these photos is that none of them look like they’re outside in a vineyard, except for Alexandras. They’re all dark or black and white, which to me defeats having the shoot in a beautiful lush green location.
The first name that Tyra calls…is…
Krista. Duh.
Alexandra. Angelea.
In the bottom two, we’ve got Jessica and Raina. Raina is strong from week to week, but she only seems to be good at romantic, not edgy. Jessica is too sweet, pretty, and commercial, which they’ve been saying for the last 3 weeks. The name Tyra calls…is…
Raina.
She keeps the brows and sends the not-so-smart baby mama home. Goodbye Jessica, you will no longer be getting me points in the Top Model pool.
Peeps – next week is the finale! Make sure to tune in to the two hour special of America’s Next Top Model. Thanks for reading!
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